21 Things I Learned In 21 Years

21 things I learned in 21 years So, today is my last day ever of being a 21 year old (although, I still feel about 14 most of the time.)I haven't been here for a super long time, and I'm hardly as wise as some of my peers, or the people that are older, and wiser, and have more life experience. But, in my short time, I've come to learn a few things...And I thought that maybe, if they've helped me, they may help you, too...  

1. Don’t let other people’s attitudes change your own

This is something my dad taught me recently, and I suppose it’s basically just a different way of saying ‘treat people the way you want to be treated’, which I know can obviously be a lot easier said than done, at times.Being kind is easy if someone gives you a reason to be, but a real test of your character is when you’re kind when someone gives you a reason not to be.This isn’t to say ‘let people walk all over you’, or ‘be friends with everyone even if their downright nasty’, but more so, don’t let someone else’s character change the way your character is. Don’t hurt someone because they hurt you… being unkind won’t make you feel better, getting back at someone won’t change a situation.

2. Comparing yourself will never make you happy

This is something that I wish I had learned a long, long time ago. But hey, I guess better late than never, huh?I spent so many years of my life thinking ‘I wish I had her nose’ or ‘I wish I had her hair’ or ‘I wish I was as skinny as she is’, and it is the worst, worst, worst, thing you can do to yourself. Every minute you spend comparing yourself to someone else, you’re belittling the brilliance that is you. Every moment you wish you had someone else’s life, you’re wasting your own.Finding a love within yourself, for yourself, is the greatest thing you can do. 

3. Nothing ever grows inside your comfort zone

It’s so easy to remain in what you’re comfortable with. To stick to what you know, to keep within the little, safe box that you’ve created for yourself. But life isn’t about security, life isn’t about sticking to what you know… Greatness never comes from comfort zones. And you will never, never know what you’re capable of until you take that leap. 

4. It’s okay to ask for help

 I think for young people in particular, it’s so deeply engrained into us to believe that asking for help makes us weak or sick. But really? It’s the exact opposite.Everybody needs help, nothing grows without help… Even the most beautiful things in nature need help to grow, and if the flowers and the trees need help, why would you think you shouldn’t?Asking for help, and being vulnerable, is sometimes the bravest thing you can do. 

5. Who you are is exactly who you’re meant to be

 Every single one of us are different. Every single one of us are beautiful, and wonderful, and unique, and in trying to change yourself to fit in to other people’s expectations of who you should be, you’re only losing yourself.You were created to be an individual, don’t let that change. 

6. Live life in the moment

 It’s so, so easy for us to think towards the future. To think about tomorrow, and next year, and the brilliance that may come ‘all in good time.’But the fact of the matter is, our lives are so, so short, and if we’re waiting for a new day for something wonderful, we’re already losing it. 

7. Go to that concert

Now, obviously, take this with a grain of salt. And hey, I’m only 21. What do I know about life and money and bills?The way I see it, if you want to do something bad enough, money will always come around, but that experience is something that will last a life time.Go to that concert.Book that holiday.Do what makes you happy. 

8. It’s okay to say no

 Learning how to say no is the most valuable thing you will ever learn…And yet, it’s something that most of us forget how to do. It’s something that most of us won’t say.You’re allowed to say no, you’re allowed to decline on invitations, you’re allowed to decide against doing something.It doesn’t make you selfish, it doesn’t make you lazy, it doesn’t make you boring. 

9. Don’t be afraid to say yes

But, also. Don’t be afraid to say yes. Don’t be afraid of new experiences.Don’t let the fear of the unknown take over, don't let the anxiety of the 'what if's control your life.Greatness could be just around the corner, and you'll never know until you let yourself take the leap 

10. Surround yourself with love

My mum likes to say two quotes, 'Surround yourself with people who feel like sunshine', and 'not your circus, not your monkeys'... And as I've gotten older, I've started to understand what that means.It's not your job to feel like you have to be friends with everyone, even when they're not good for you. It's not your job to feel guilty for not talking to people who are the living persona of negativity.Your life is too short to be surrounded by people who don’t make you feel like your best self. 

11. Bad days will end

If you think your fairytale is at its end, and you haven’t reached your happily ever after, you still have so far to go.You’ve survived 100% of bad days thus far, you can survive this one too. 

12. “All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them” – Walt Disney

 Don’t be afraid to dream the impossible, don't feel silly for reaching too high. The only limit to your dreams is how high you reach. 

13. Life is a gift.

Life itself is a gift.Waking up again is a gift.Open it.Celebrate it.Enjoy it. 

14. Not everyone is going to like you

Not everyone is going to understand you.You can not make people love you, or like you, or validate you, or accept you, or be nice to you.The good news is:It doesn't matter.You are not designed for everyone. 

15. Pursue your passions

I've always said that every single person was put on this world for a reason. The reason we're all so different, is because we're all created to do different things. Your passion may be different to those around you, your purpose may not meet up with your siblings, or your parents, or your friends.If you feel like you're designed to do something, if you feel your heart beat faster and your mind rush with excitement at the thought of something... pursue it with every part of you.Stop wishing, and just do it. 

15. Self love is important

Put yourself at the top of your to-do list every single day, and the rest will fall into place. 

15. Your worth isn’t determined by others

Your worth isn't determined by the amount of followers you have, or the amount of likes you receive on a photo.Your worth isn't determined by how many post on your facebook wall for your birthday, or how many parties you're invited to.Your worth is determined by how you treat other people.Your worth is determined by what you put into the world.Your worth is determined by your character. 

15. My body is my home, and I need to look after it

 Now, I don’t mean this in the whole health-guru ‘your body is a temple so drink green smoothies and exercise for three hours a day. Hot chips are from the devil and donuts are satanic’.(Although if that is you, more power to you!).You have one body, and as corny and cringey as it may seem, it’s the only one you have. It’s kinda the most important thing in your life, y’know? My pa always told me that my body is like a car. Now, I don’t know the first thing about cars other than if you don’t look after it, it’s not very good. Loving your body doesn’t just mean eating good food (and enough food), it also means not hating it for being… well, a body. It means not hating every curve, or mark, or scar.It means loving it for all that it can do, not all that it isn't. 

19. Gratitude multiples happiness.

If we only think of the things that we can't do, and don't have, and aren't, and will never be, it's impossible to be happy.Gratitude is the best of all emotions... And the more you express gratitude for what you have, the more life will give you to be grateful about.

19. Don’t worry.

Easier said than done, huh? Especially if you're someone like me who has a bit of a habit about worrying over everything...Something I've started to try to teach myself though, is to be comfortable in the present, and to not worry over things I can't change... or, the things that I can change, for that matter.If there's something I can't change, it isn't worth my time to worry.If it's something I can change, then I have an opportunity to do something about it. 

21. Your life is an occasion, rise to it.

I'm saving the best (and my most favourite) to last. Ever since I first saw the film Mr Megoriums Wonder Emporium seven years ago, this quote stuck with me. I say it to everyone who will listen, I end every single talk with it, and I'm genuinely planning on getting it tattooed to my body (mum, dad, if you're reading this, forget I said anything).We only have one beautiful, crazy, incredible, wonderful life. We have one chance of living it, and living it to the best of our ability.Being sad, and scared, and anxious, and worried, and waiting for something better.... it's such a waste of time.We're living. Right now, we're alive, and breathing, and we have the whole world at our feet.So let's do something with it.  This is 21 year old Chloe signing out for the last time.